Friday, April 24, 2009 6:53 PM
YAY i was on time for school today and i managed to stay throughout till 4:30 okay.
like finally.
baby came to pick me up, even though the weather was hot hot hot.
& yes, ORD LOOOOOOO :D
im so glad today's a friday but at the same time i dont like it, because
weekends = boyf working + lots of FYP stuff to complete :(
i feel like shitting as im blogging, okay random.
ANYWAY.
omg. dear you, i cant believe i just read those entries.
oh, so you finally admitted that you lied?
i mean, honestly, relent about what? because you cried?
i thought the previous time we quarreled during my belated bday dinner, we already made it very clear, no matter what you're still our friend.
(yes, come to think of it, u cried too and i gave in, omg)
"no matter how i cried" so you are telling me you were finding a good way to cry or something? i seriously dont understand.
yes, now i read that, i really did, i really read that you 'do not want friends like these' (:
like what? may i know?
will u please stand in OUR shoes then? i dont understand. we have family, you have too, we have school, you have too, the only difference i could think of is you feel left out cos we spend most of our time with boyfs.
can i please stress that, even though my boyf has just ord-ed, we dont have much time tgt anymore because he has to work and i have fyp to worry about, that was why my holidays were pretty reserved for him & only him.
is there anything wrong with that? i seriously dont think so.
unless u wanna tell me u dont understand such feelings.
why was my voice stern?
during the first 20 minutes of the conversation havent i been talking nicely to you asking you to stop crying and tell me whats up.
my voice was stern because when i ask you a proper question you couldnt even answer.
something like 'did sherie scold you or did she not', it's just a simple yes-no question yet you can go one big round like 'she said forget it means shes not happy',
sorry but crying doesnt always work, in this case, it does not. theres really nothing to cry over, i was so calm initially because i see it as a small issue, i mean, if u say u werent blogging about us then so be it. my 'forget it' works the same way as sherie's, 'forget it' truly means forget it.
now i know.
you can lie without blinking. thanks.
to think i was still saying maybe it was our fault for overreacting to your entry.
omg. what the hell was i thinking. i think im the clown. right?
think properly, not with your brain nvm, just use any part of you that can think,
did we NOT stand up for you when u were down or something?
first, gerald's case, did i NOT say i wanted to go and confront him?
you were the one who said 'it's okay already' you even said hi to him, then fine.
second, J's case, how many times have I put in good words for you? or you mean I didnt? how many times I told C to ask J out even though he just wanted me & him for a dinner? did I not tell you many times, it's okay.. it's alright. huh?
can you tell me why?
if being a friend (minus whatever best friend bullshit right now), you can write something like 'i did so much for them but they didnt do anything for me', something along this line, are you sure you are a friend? i thought friends shouldnt be calculative and list down what have i done, what have they not done for me etc etc?
yes, if thats what u would like, i just did the same already.
you know what, you are all about yourself.
in your head its all the 'me me me me me', its either you are obsessed with yourself or you simply do not realise it.
go and read back your entries.
correct me if im wrong.
yah, i think you would, cos everyone/everything is wrong but you & your so-called beliefs.
go ahead, go ahead and do what you believe in, i would be happy for you when you're finally back to yourself and not be pretentious. i would be glad you can look into the mirror, and see yourself, not your physical looks, but whatever you are.
are you really yiwen or not?
or are you trying so hard to be someone special?
we are not true friends, im sorry about it,
i hope you find your true friend(s) soon okay.
till then, a very very goodbye.
p/s: no im not asking for any replies/smses/calls/entries from you. all those questions are for you & yourself (yes, all about you) to ponder over. whether you get it or not, its all up to you.
you can continue to stick to your beliefs of course(:
